"Outraged" by Kurt Gray

"Outraged" is a solid contender for my book of the year title. The author explained so many peculiar things about human behaviour using simple facts. You know my style of books—I love it when authors clear up misconceptions. Here's the list of the most essential points for me:

• Humans evolved as prey, not apex predators.
• Hence, we're evolutionarily charged to fight against harm, even perceived or potential harm.
• However, in our modern world, we are extremely safe (compared to ancient times), so our ideas behind what's harmful have crept so much that we perceive even harmless things as potentially dangerous.
• This means that humans are primarily driven by the protection narrative, instead of the destruction narrative.
• Group morality has risen as a mechanism to decrease harm from other group members.
• Morality is subjective and culturally charged. Hence, it differs from person to person.
• There's no such thing as a harmless wrong because perceived harm is subjective.
• Different groups of people perceive harm (and morality) differently, but the protection narrative still drives most.
• For instance, liberals and conservatives try to do what's right to minimize harm perceived by them (and their group); very few want to harm society on purpose.
• "CIV" is a great framework to bridge the divides: connect, invite and validate.
• Facts never change anyone's minds because facts can be interpreted differently and dismissed for any reason.
• What drives understanding is stories of harm; they bridge the divide best.
• Abusive people use "DARVO": deny, attack, reverse the victim and the offender.
• Role-casting makes it challenging to see how offenders can be harmed and how victims can harm.

"Outraged" helped me understand many people with opinions that differ from mine. It always puzzled me why people might do something that hurts them. "Leopards Eating People's Faces Party." Now I know better.